A Life Not Realized
by Godricsgrl89
Summary: Jess' past is come to life when a call from a Social Worker in San Fransisco, California where a little girl has just been left alone after her mother died. Their is some details that may not be suitable for younger viewers. Slight crossover with Charmed
1. Prologue

A Life Not Realized

Prologue

-2001-New York City-

Jess Mariano, age seventeen, walked into his mother's apartment in the slums of the city. He was swaying, dangerously so as the door shut behind him. The apartment was small, not even suitable for the four human beings that lived there. Only two bedrooms, a kitchen and bathroom could not hold all of them for long but because of the lack of income coming from the residents, it's all they could do.

Jess' mother, Liz Danes, was in the corner with her head hung in shame as she took in Jess' appearance. His eyes were blood shot and the dark circles that resembled sleep deprivation were practically radiating off his face. His nose was covered in bloody residue after he had probably had another nosebleed, not an uncommon occurrence for the teen.

"How could you?" The almost silent cry over on the couch not two feet from him could be heard. A girl with light brown hair and tears streaming down her face stared at him. Her anguish at what he was doing could hurt everything she had worked to do for all of their benefits. She had a job and she gave him little money for things that they would need around the apartment but he always came home empty handed and looking as if he was high as a kite. "I gave you that money for some formula and what do you do? You hock it all to some dealer for what one dose? God can't you think about anything besides the drugs, like oh I don't know, YOUR DAUGHTER!"

The small baby the woman was holding wailed as her mother's voice raised. Her small hands shook in fury and beat on her mother's chest at the cruelty of waking from her slumber. Her big brown eyes, so like her father has, were shedding tiny beads of water as the sobbing got louder and louder. Her pink hand me down jumper was getting more wet by the moment and surely the minute someone tried to calm her she would wet her diaper.

"Kat I got the…um what's wrong Jenny?" he said toddling over to the infant with curiosity as the drugs began to wear down in his system. He had most likely taken a snort because he would not down fall this fast if it had been via the crack pipe.

She pulled Jenny away from him just as he was about to caress her chubby cheeks to calm her down. "Don't you dare touch her! You promised me when you found out that you would stop. Promised! Does that word even register in your drugged up mind. I told you that she needed stability, nothing flashy but at least a decent family that would love her and try to provide for her." Kat was angry as she handed Jenny off to Liz, who had started crying, looking at what her son had become, and she blamed herself.

"Kat stop, what are you doing?" He asked as he witnessed her pulling out a suitcase and Jenny's diaper bag filling them to the rim with everything imaginable she and Jenny would need.

"What does it look like Mariano? I am packing, something I should have done a long time ago. You may not want to change your life for Jenny but I sure as hell do. I got my act together for our daughter, and you just keep going on like you did before. I'm taking Jenny, somewhere you will NEVER find us. If you ever straighten up your act I'll find out and I'll make sure you can see her but until then just go on your way throwing your life out the window!" Kat closed her eyes to regain her composure. She went over and grabbed Jenny from Liz, giving her a hug and a hidden piece of paper as she did so, and left, never to darken the streets of New York again.

Jess stared after her, eyes welling up as he realized what his chosen lifestyle had cost him. He looked at the wallet-sized picture of Jenny, Kat and him, back when he was able to control his addiction. The tears fell freely as his mother made her way over to him and held him in her arms as he cried. "Mom, Mom, I need to stop this I can't, I just can't do this anymore. Kat's right I need to get out of this, Please help me." He begged and he felt his mother nod. Less then a week later Jess was in a rehab center thanks to some money Liz had conned out of Jess' father Jimmy and Jess was on the road to recovery.

A/N  
All right, so here it is. I got bored in my Health class when we were going over drug information and started writing. I have more and I am just figuring out how to set it up so that people will like it. If you guys want to see more of what happens with Jess, Kat, and Jenny please review. I'm on a little amount of time at the moment though so if I don't update for awhile don't be angry. I am graduating soon and I am being bombarded with work but I will do the best to my ability to keep anyone who actually reads this happy.


	2. News

A Life Not Realized

Chapter One: News

-2008-Philedelphia-

A long haired girl sat beside her boyfriend laughing as he spilled a little bit of milk, which he insisted on drinking with his coffee, all over his new cotton button down dress shirt. He let out a growl of frustration and attacked his laughing girlfriend with his lips. Giggles could be heard from the blue eyed brunette.

She ended up landing ungracefully on the floor beside the desk up in the Truncheon office space which formally housed four of the owners of the establishment. He pinned her to the floor kissing her neck and nipping at her sensitive skin playfully. She moaned into his ministrations leaning her head back to give him more access as he reached her throat.

His fingers glided across the hem of her loose fitting t-shirt and just as he was to pull it up… "Mariano, you got a phone call, and can you mention to them not to call the shop phone on long distance again? This is going to screw with our budgets estimates." Jess' business partner could be heard after fifteen feet still laughing at the beating red face of the coed he had been caught with.

"I swear it, Matt, if you ever do that again I will kill you." She yelled straightening herself out and running through the door to attack the man who had become more like a brother to her since she had moved to Philly to find and reconcile with Jess. Jess laughed at the sibling like antics and picked up the extension of the main shop phone in the office. The button for line two was flashing and he pressed it.

"This is Jess Mariano," he said casually assuming it was someone who didn't know the rules regarding the Truncheon landline, and he was right.

"Hello, Mr. Mariano, this is Paige Matthews with the Bay Area Social Services office in San Francisco. I am calling in regard to Katharine Myles. Does she sound at all familiar to you?" Her voice sounded oddly familiar to the now stunned Jess. He hadn't heard the name Katharine Myles in close to seven years.

"Yes… I mean of course she does. We were friends back when I lived in New York, but that was years ago. Why would anyone want to talk to me about her now?" Jess swallowed as a sudden tightness entered his now smoldering throat. Even now, seven years after the fact, just the idea of her broke his heart.

"Are you aware that she has a seven year old daughter?" The social worker's voice sounded accusative as if maybe he had done something wrong to Kat.

"Well I should say yes, considering I'm her father." He retorted and he could hear a deep intake of breath as apparently Paige tried to digest the information.

"Kat never told me about Jenny's father." Confessed the obviously guilty feeling woman. "I'm sorry but as the social worker on the case I had to see why you were requested to be the one to take in Jenny if anything were to happen to Kat." Paige sniffled making Jess all the more uncomfortable with the conversation.

"No offence Mrs. Matthews but I haven't seen Kat nor Jenny in close to seven years. So why if it is so important could you not call at a semi-decent hour. If the time difference is hard to figure out, I will enlighten you. It is currently eight-forty-five on a Friday night. Do you care to tell me why you're calling now?" Jess stated irritated as his daughter came into the discussion and making him feel just like he did when he was seventeen and proved that he wasn't ready for that sort of responsibility.

"None taken, but I would appreciate it if you refrained from being so hostile. I realize the lateness of the hour and I apologize but this matter couldn't wait. Kat was one of my first cases here and I kept a close eye on her and Jenny over the years. We ended up becoming friends and I did all that was within my power to help her with any stressful situation so that she and Jenny would be safe." Paige took a deep breath to gently break the news to Jess.

"Kat and Jenny were in a car accident this past Tuesday, with disastrous results. We are thinking foul play but we can't be sure about that for a while. Kat died at the hospital on Wednesday about eight hours after it happened. Jenny saw the whole thing. She was lucky enough to escape with a few minor abrasions, a broken arm and a concussion." Paige had started shedding tears and by the end of it she was hiccupping uncontrollably.

Jess was silent. He kept thinking, _'Kat's dead, Jenny's hurt but…my god what is going to happen to her? _Jess shakily inhaled and spoke "where is she? I want to see my daughter where are they keeping her." Tears had finally started to fall down his cheeks as he slammed his hand on his desk causing an avalanche of papers fall down to the ground.

"You have to calm down ok? She is currently at San Francisco Memorial under the care of Dr. Griffiths. He's a trauma specialist and he treated my older sister for injuries a few years back. He's taking good care of her but… well I just advise you come down here soon. She is extremely frightened and just keeps asking for well, you I guess." With that said Paige finished her goodbyes and hung up but not before Jess heard a male voice yell over at the woman to hurry up.

Suddenly it all fell into place. He was going to see his daughter again. The little girl he had dreamt of seeing again since he got out of rehab. He wiped away the tear streaks which would earn him questions and proceeded down the stairs.

The love of his life was laughing with Matt who kept making funny faces for just shear amusement and it finally dawned on him. _Oh my god! What am I going to tell her.'_

_A/N  
Ok people I got about three reviews last time I checked. So if you keep sending them I will update as fast as my very full agenda will allow. I needed to write this though ok. Because we just had a horrible loss in my house and this is what my therapist told me to do to calm down. I don't like sympathy so I don't really tell people this stuff but this is also sort of like an outlet to make sure I don't fall apart. Ok so please review I appreciate the feedback from those who did. Also to my friend Mel, if you don't review the next authors note won't be so happy. TTYL all and please REVIEW!_


	3. Reveal

A Life Not Realized

Chapter 3 Reveal

-2008-Philedelphia-Cont.

'Oh My God? What am I going to tell her?'

Jess took a deep breath preparing for the inevitable news he would have to tell her. He knew that he should have told her earlier, hell he should have told her back when they lived in Stars Hollow but he had never summoned up the courage to do so.

He had always thought about Kat and how angry she was that day she had taken off and left him for the sake of their daughter. He had many times over the last seven years imagined what his little girl looked like now that she was older. He just wished he knew for sure. Now, he couldn't make things right with Kat because she was gone, and he was all poor Jenny had left.

Walking up to Rory, who was grinning and teasing Matt mercilessly, Jess tapped her shoulder and whispered "I need to talk to you." She turned her head a silent question clearly present on her face. Jess nodded his head toward the office space that he had just vacated. She shrugged and jumped right up going to the stairs.

He followed trying not to fall apart as his approach meant he was coming closer to her most likely pulling away from him. He could practically taste the fury she was going to inflict on his already pained body. He hated himself for lying to her; she had been nothing but honest with him since they had started speaking again two years previous.

"What's up?" She asked sitting down on the edge of the desk her legs swinging back in forth in the air just above the floor. "Who was on the phone?" Jess bit his lip trying to think of how he should start. "Jess?" He tilted his head down letting the tears fly down his already red face. He fell to his knees unable to hold himself up anymore.

"I'm so sorry Rory." He mumbled hating that he was showing such weakness in front of her. It was so hard for him to speak and his heart was breaking at the thought of her leaving him, but he couldn't not tell her about Jenny, she would have found out sooner or later and he preferred she find out from him and not some other person.

"Jess hey, what's wrong?" Rory asked kneeling down so that she could look into his tear filled eyes. "Baby come on talk to me." She tried to wipe away his tears but they just kept on coming not slowing down one bit.

"I'm so sorry," he breathed out not finding enough strength to do more. He breathed in again getting back up to his feet; supporting himself by putting his hands on the desk he stopped the river of tears in their stead.

"What are you so sorry about Jess? You're scaring me Dodger." She hadn't called him that since the two of them were in high school and he was avoiding conversation and conflict like the plague.

"I… Rory you have to understand something before I tell you this. I was really screwed up back in New York. I don't just mean skipping school and staying out all night, I mean partying, booze, drugs all of it." He let her take in this little piece of information before he continued.

"I knew that Jess, when we went to hang out in Stars Hollow last year for Christmas your mom told me. Why would I be upset, you got your act together, that's a good thing?" Jess shook his head in response.

"Rory you don't get it, I was a messed up kid and I did some really stupid stuff. The one thing that I really messed up was my chance at… being a parent." Rory's face went blank as she tried to digest this tiny bit of information.

"A parent?" Her voice was quizzical and frightened like she knew exactly what he was about to tell her. She gulped sitting down beside him trying to understand what he was saying without actually assuming anything.

"Yeah, Rory, before I moved to Stars Hollow I… well my friend Kat and I, we had a daughter together." The sharp intake of breath coming from the blue eyed beauty made Jess realize that she wasn't angry, at least not yet, but she was sad or at least that's what he thought from the sounds coming from her still form.

"Jess why? Why didn't you tell me?" He could see the tears hit her hands as they fell unceremoniously down her angelic face. The gulp of air she took made Jess want to hit himself continuously for his own stupidity and making her cry like this.

"Because Rory, I never thought I would see them again. Kat left about two months before I even met you and she swore that I would never see her or my little girl again. I didn't blame her, I deserved it. Rory I was a horrible parent, Kat would give me money to go get formula or diapers and I would use it for a hit on the streets. I never thought about what my actions would cost me back then and hell even after I got out of rehab I was still a mess." Jess walked around the room his hands flying in every direction to make his point.

"Then why did you tell me now. If you are never going to see them again then why tell me now, I'm your fiancé you're supposed to trust me with your secrets. Now just all of a sudden you tell me you have a daughter you haven't seen in about seven years, it's not sensible to hide it from me for this long and then just spill the beans, there has to be a reason behind it!" Rory yelled at him making Jess feel like even more of a heal than he already did.

"I get you're angry, I'm angry at myself for not telling you sooner but now is really important. I have the chance to make up for my mistakes from back then. I have a chance to see my little girl again. I have a chance to be a real father to her than the crack ass her mother left. I have the chance to raise my daughter as the person I am now, not the one who's only concern was his next way to get high."

"That still doesn't answer my question Jess. What made you tell me now, seven years after we met and three months after you asked me to marry you. Should I change my mind, should I turn down your proposal? I don't want to, but I want the truth now or we're OVER!" Rory howled not caring that her words were tearing into the distraught father like a thousand knives all over his body.

"FINE RORY, you want the fucking truth. Kat is DEAD! The person who called was a social worker in San Francisco who was a friend of hers. Jenny is hurt and she keeps asking for of all people me. Kat had a Will and guess what, she left custody to me. ME! I'm not going to turn the chance to raise my child when she needs me." Jess' retort had Rory stuttering for words. She had to admit now she felt bad. A child lost her mother and the father she hadn't seen since was a baby was all she wanted.

"Jess, I'm sorry. Please forgive me for being so cruel. I didn't know and just the idea of you having a child I didn't know about brought out all this pain and jealousy. I'm so sorry." Rory pleaded with him and a small smile appeared on his face. He kissed her cheek showing his understanding. "I didn't mean it." She mumbled as his kiss on her cheek moved to her throat right where she turned week.

He chuckled pulling away eliciting sigh of frustration from his beautiful fiancé. "I know, it's just what you said hurt. I know I hurt you by not telling you but I honestly didn't…"

Rory jumped him kissing him hard. "Enough with the apologies, lets go to California, we can stop in on your dad after we pick up Jenny." Jess eyes widened.

"We?" Rory grinned kissing him again and nodded earning her a twirl in the arms of one Jess Mariano.

* * *

A/N

Alright I finally updated. You know how it goes, you review I attempt to add more and with the holidays I'm clear for a couple of weeks.

TTYL  
Chris

ALSO I OWN NOTHING!!!!


	4. Meeting

First of all folks I AM SO sorry it took so long to update. I am doing my best with all my stories to update them but I may be starting a new job soon, so that may actually be the reason for wanting to update so much now.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, Gilmore Girls and Charmed characters included all rights and names and stuff like that goes to the individual writers and creators.

**A Life Not Realized**

**Chapter 4 Meeting**

**-2008-San Francisco**

The flight was short, at least it had been to Jess, who had been so used to driving or relocating using the bus the using the plane had cut a significant amount of time from the journey. Rory was practically asleep with her head upon his shoulder as they strode through the airport terminal in San Francisco. They had only packed a small carryon bag each as there luggage because they had no intention of staying in California all that long. After insuring Kat's stuff was handled and Jenny was comfortable with Jess, as per the Social Workers advice, and then they were going to rent a car and drive down to L.A. and visit Jimmy Mariano, Jess' father, who he had reconnected with years before, and his family. From there they would board a fly back home to Philadelphia and settle into their apartment with Jess' daughter.

The Rent-A-Car place wasn't particular full at such an early hour in the morning but there were still a good four people ahead of the sleep deprived couple. Life was starting to bustle by them as they finally got to the car, which happened to be a new model Nissan X-Terra with all the amenities. On there way to the Bay Area Social Services Office Jess and Rory were discussing Jess' new manuscript which he was having published within the week.

As they pulled into the lot around the office they saw a mint green VW Bug trundle in behind them, the woman who stepped out had dark brown hair and a pair of glasses. She looked haggard and stressed as she approached their unfamiliar truck. She stuck her head in sight of the window and motioned for Jess, who was driving, to roll down the window. He did so, albeit reluctantly and greeted her, "hello ma'am, I'm looking for Paige Matthews, she called me about my daughter, Jennifer Myles last night."

The woman smiled kindly at his words and replied, "Hi, I'm Paige, and you must be Jess. Kat told me a lot about you. So did your mother when I called her last week that was how I managed to get your number. Why don't you and your friend," at this she waved and smiled at Rory who was wide awake now with a thermos full of fresh coffee in her hand, "come on in. I'll call the house to let them know you're here and then we'll go see Jenny. She a great kid Jess, she actually looks exactly like you." Paige said offhandedly and ushered Jess and Rory inside of the building to her little cubicle.

Paige unpacked her purse and paperwork she was carrying with her and then set about dialing on her office telephone, "Hi Leo, her dad's here. Yeah I know but hey you're the one that agreed to look after her, I didn't want her going to a foster home. Yes I know she's seven years old and still healing WHAT! How am I supposed to explain that? Yes I know he hasn't se… ooh you so oh me. Call Sam, he'll know what to do. Bye." She growled toward the end slamming the receiver back in the phone's cradle.

"Is everything ok?" Jess enquired and Rory was still trying to wrap her head around the heated, one way, argument that had just occurred in front of her.

"Oh of course, it's fine. He's my brother in law and my nephew, he's five, was playing with Jenny. Apparently she's a really fast healer pretty much all her cuts and bruises are gone and her arm is moving better, she took it out of the wrap the doctor had around it." Paige laughed half-heartedly and placed a few forms in front of a confused Jess. "Just fill these out and we'll go see Jenny, my sister offered to take her in when she got out of the hospital, at my insistence. I didn't want her to go into a foster home even for just one night if it could be avoided." She continued as Jess was setting pen to paper with amazing speed.

"Wow, he's fast," Paige said after seeing that Jess was on the third page in just as many minutes and from personal experience she knew that the questions and signatures required usually took at least double that.

"Yeah I know, he's a writer and he always starts out in notebooks, it puts even my speed writing to shame when he's determined." Rory commented back smiling at the half grin, yet concentrated look, her fiancé was sporting.

"Kat never mentioned him being a writer; I think Liz may have mentioned it but not much." Paige responded.

"Oh yeah in Philly he and a few friends own and run a publishing company it's called Truncheon Books. He's written three books now and his newest one is about to hit the stores." Rory said proud of Jess' accomplishment.

"Impressive, say Rory right," at that Rory nodded "I have to ask but how long have you and Jess been together. I noticed that rather beautiful on your finger and figure he's the one that put it there." Rory nodded smiling fondly in Jess direction once again. "Well, congratulations but I have to ask, will having Jenny in Jess' life make it hard on you two. I mean you said he's a writer and by your comments I'd say you're employed similarly but will Jenny living with Jess and you put a damper on your relationship?" Paige felt a wee built guilty about asking but she had to know if Jenny was going to a good home with a father who would love her and a soon-to-be stepmother would hopefully be the same way.

"I know you're worried that I won't care for Jenny, or that my being with Jess or our individual jobs will get in the way of Jess and I caring for her but I can assure Jess loves her more than anything, he got cleaned up for her and later built a better life for himself. Jenny is lucky to have Jess for a dad, both of our father's were less than good and Jess overcame that, do you know that he would have broken up with me if I didn't want to come with him, to be a part of his child's life, a child I didn't even know existed until twelve hours ago because my boyfriend, the man I have loved since I was seventeen refused to tell anyone about her because just her and her mother's names broke his heart. Instead I surprised him. I wanted to stay, I wanted to help him in anyway possible to care for the child he left behind while he got his act together. I love him and since Jenny is a part of him I know that I will love her too." Rory let out her winded reply and Paige sat in her rolling chair stunned that the small woman could go that long without taking a breath. She felt new respect for Jess' fiancé and even kind of liked her.

"Done," Jess said only a few seconds after Rory had finished and Paige looked through the paperwork with practiced ease and nodded as everything seemed in order.

"Ok let's go see that little girl of yours. Do you want me to drive or do you guys just want to follow me." Paige asked and the response was Jess jingling a set of keys in his hand. "Alright, let's hit the road."

The drive was shorter than the couple expected but what they saw as they pulled up to the house where Paige parked they were shocked. A woman in her mid-thirties, who looked to much like Paige not to be the sister she was talking about, was outside the house with a small child in her arms watching as two little boys and a little girl with dark brown medium length hair were playing tag under her close eye. The girl was wearing a small wrap around her left forearm but otherwise looked amazingly perfect for a child who had just been in a car accident the week before.

"Hey Piper," Paige waved at the woman sitting on the ground and came to sit by her in a chair just behind. "Hi little Mel," Paige baby spoke to the small child in her big sister's arms. As Rory and Jess got out of there truck Paige introduced them, "Piper this is Jess Mariano and his fiancé Rory Gilmore. Jess is Jenny's dad." She explained snagging the small child into her arms while her sister stood to shake both Jess and Rory's hands.

"Pleasure to meet you both, Jenny has been so great. She gets along with my sons pretty well, the blonde munchkin is Wyatt and the brown haired one is my little peanut Chris." She said and called "boys time for lunch, Jenny your dad's here." The three children ran up at the woman's call and while the boys rushed for the front door to get inside Jenny halted right in front of the new arrivals and to every ones surprise she jumped into Jess' arms and with the just the right amount of quick thinking Jess was holding his daughter for the first time in seven years.

"Momma showed me pictures of you everyday. She always said that you loved me and that if something happened I was to stay with you. Oh daddy I've wanted to meet you for so long but momma could never get time off work to bring me she's been saying since I was little that you were her best friend and that she was sad that she had to leave with me but it was best. She would say sorry for hours and hours and hours…" the little girl said latched onto her long lost father's neck.

"Jenny you have no idea how much I have missed you. Everyday I would wonder 'are they alright' and I just didn't know and I was scared that something would happen and I'm so sorry about your momma you know she was my best friend too when we were little, we were younger than you when we met and we hit it off immediately. I'm just sorry I was such a bad daddy that she had to take you and leave me." Jess whispered into his little girl's hair.

"Momma always said you weren't a bad daddy, you were just sick and she left to make sure you got better. I got letters from Grandma Liz that's how I found out you were coming. I got ones yesterday from Miss Paige and Miss Piper read it to me saying you would be here soon. I wish momma was still here but at least now she's with the angels and I get to be with you." She whispered back like the two were conspiring.

"Oh my little Jenny how I missed you so much, I love you little one, you know that." Jess said dropping a kiss on the child's forehead and she giggled as his lips touched her skin.

"I love you too daddy," the girl said and she reached up and kissed his forehead like he had hers.


End file.
